Opening Up About PMDD
Opening Up About PMDD: Release the Burden of Carrying It Alone
For many people living with PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder), one of the hardest parts isn’t just the symptoms — it’s the silence around them. It’s 2026, and yet women’s health challenges still feel somewhat taboo?! There’s such a lack of understanding around how our cycles make us feel, and often it’s brushed off as ‘normal’… (it’s common, but it definitely should not be the norm!)
When up to 2 weeks of your month are ruled by feeling a different version of yourself – holding it together, masking it and carrying the strain of that alone, is totally exhausting.
Whether you’re newly suspecting PMDD, recently diagnosed, or have known for years but struggle to talk about it, I’ve written this blog to help you find a way to share the load, in a way that feels comfortable for you.
Opening up about PMDD can feel incredibly vulnerable. There’s fear of being misunderstood, dismissed, or it not going the way you hoped. But the truth is: not talking about PMDD doesn’t make it easier. It often makes it heavier.
Why Talking About PMDD Feels So Difficult
PMDD is still widely misunderstood. Many people have never heard of it, and even fewer understand that it’s a severe cyclical mood disorder, not “bad PMS”.
When your mood, energy, and perception change dramatically across your cycle, it can make you doubt yourself and who you are as a person — that makes it even harder to be confident explaining it to someone else.
Common fears I hear from clients include:
“What if they think I’m exaggerating?”
“What if they don’t understand or think something is wrong with me?”
“What if they take it personally?”
“What if this changes how they see me?”
Add to this the neurological changes that occur in the luteal phase — increased emotional reactivity and reduced emotional regulation — and it makes complete sense that communicating can feel impossible at times.
Many people only try to explain PMDD when they’re already overwhelmed or in conflict (hello luteal phase!) and when those conversations don’t go well, it reinforces the belief that staying silent is the safer thing to do. However,
When PMDD stays unspoken, it often shows up as:
Guilt for needing more rest, space, or reassurance
Shame around mood changes or withdrawal
Self-blame for relationship tension
Feeling unseen or unsupported, even in close relationships
It’s also worth considering the effects of continued emotional suppression. It’s something that increases stress on the nervous system — which can actually worsen PMDD symptoms over time.
Opening up about PMDD isn’t about blaming others or asking for special treatment. It’s about removing the extra layer of pressure that comes from pretending you’re okay when you’re not. It’s taking a big huge sigh of relief. You are not facing this alone anymore.
What Opening Up About PMDD Really Means
Opening up about PMDD does not mean you have to:
Explain everything perfectly
Share your experience with everyone
Have all the answers
Ask others to “fix” it for you
What it does mean is:
Naming what you’re experiencing honestly
Letting trusted people understand what’s happening
Reducing confusion and misinterpretation
Allowing support to exist where it can/where feels right for you
You are always in control of how much you share, who you share with, and when.
When Is the Best Time to Talk About PMDD?
Timing matters more than perfection.
Trying to talk about PMDD during intense symptoms — especially in the luteal phase — can feel like trying to explain yourself through fog. It’s also very easy to react in an unhelpful way to the responses or questions you get.
The most supportive conversations tend to happen:
When symptoms are low (often follicular phase or ovulation)
When there isn’t active conflict
When anyone involved has emotional capacity
How to Start the Conversation About PMDD
If you’re wondering how to begin, keep it simple, grounded, and relational.
Here are a few gentle ways to start the conversation:
Lead with care
“I want to talk about something that I have been struggling with for a while now, it’s really hard for me to talk about, but I know it’s going to help me if I have a support system.”
“I experience PMDD, which causes significant mood and emotional changes at certain points in my menstrual cycle.”
Share impact, not just symptoms
“During (x) time, things can feel much heavier for me, and my reactions don’t always reflect how I truly feel long-term. Some of the symptoms I experience are (…)”
Name one or two needs
“What helps most during that phase is (example: reassurance and lower stimulation.)”
If You Struggle With The Conversation -
You can take the pressure off by using external resources (sending articles, podcasts, guides) so the responsibility to educate doesn’t fall entirely on you.
You can find lots of helpful resources on www.thehappyhormonesclub.com / for videos I like YouTube or BBC. You can also direct people to The PMDD Project (www.thepmddproject.org).
Why Naming Your Needs Changes Everything
One of the most powerful outcomes of opening up about PMDD is being able to name your needs without shame.
You might need:
More reassurance or emotional safety
Less stimulation or social pressure
More rest
More space — without it meaning rejection
Practical support when capacity is low
When needs go unspoken, others are left guessing — and you’re left feeling disappointed or misunderstood.
When needs are named clearly:
Loved ones know how to support you
Misinterpretations reduce
You stop carrying the emotional load alone
Opening Up About PMDD Is an Ongoing Process
Talking about PMDD isn’t a one-time conversation that fixes everything. It’s a process of education, reflection, and adjustment.
Some people will understand quickly. Others may need time. That doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong.
What matters is that you stop silencing yourself to keep the peace.
Further Support
It is incredibly common for PMDD to affect your romantic relationships. This is generally made worse due to lack of understanding, not having the right tools in place and miscommunications between partners.
The Happy Hormones Club have put together a PMDD Relationship Rescue Kit – including key scripts for different scenarios that arise due to PMDD + communication practices designed specifically for PMDD symptoms and conflict.
Follow the step-by-step strategy building tools either on your own or with your partner, for building a healthy & supportive relationship even through the PMDD storm.
Grab your copy of the PMDD Relationship Rescue Kit Here
Group Support Sessions
If you are struggling to find the right person to lean on through this, The PMDD Project run free monthly support sessions called ‘The Monthlies’ – you can find information on how to join via their Instagram @thepmddproject
For Information on whether a 1:1 PMDD coaching plan is the right fit for you, email info@thehappyhormonesclub.com or book a consultation